RETROCRUSH COMIC STRIP ARCHIVE

I've always had a desire to do some sort of regular comic strip, but never seemed to be able to come up with the discipline to make it work out. I'm better off at one shot things, if anything. Here's a "fun" look back at some trial and error comics I've done at retroCRUSH through the years. Some of these go back as far as 1997 or so. They're all pretty horrible in their own way.

THE ADVENTURES OF BONE BOY
 I made these comic strips back in 2000, and they're kind of funny to look back on in a train-wreck sort of way. I was legitimately trying to make a bad strip, but I like the character nonetheless and hope to bring him back some day.

I don't know why being a gay necrophiliac is a punch line, but I always dug those classic comic strips where the joke victim is so blown over that their heels shoot up in the air in amazement. It's sort  of the comic strip equivalent of a spit take. 

I used my good buddy Steve as the poor victim of this comic strip. Steve has both eyes on the same side of his face, as you can see. I also love the idea of giant computers that still have reel to reel tapes on top.  

Every good hero needs a good origin story. Unfortunately, Bone-Boy's isn't very good.

Ha ha! What the fuck does this even mean? It also just occurred to me that Bikini Girl's incessant desire to screw Bone-Boy makes her a necrophiliac, too!

You can really notice he's checking out her camel toe because of the dotted lines that are coming out of his eyes.

Get it? See, she's dead so she can't get a sex change, now! Let this be a lesson to you, kids!

I'm embarrassed to even put this strip on there. You can't get more sexist than this, can you? Also, check out the crazy proportions of Bikini Girl in panel 1. She looks almost cubist.

THE ADVENTURES OF NO-EYELID-MAN

This one still makes me laugh. It's from round 2000, too, and was inspired by a silly 3 panel sketch my buddy Steve Graf made in college that I re-adapted in these first 3 panels. Anyway, I liked the idea of traditional superhero origin sources with more realistic side effects.

 HULK VS. MISTER T SKETCH (2006)

I don't even remember drawing this at all, but I like it.

I think what I'm trying to say with this strip is that we have to stop listening to our dicks, and pay more attention to what our taints are trying to say.  Otherwise, we just end up in arguments that end up in violence.  Plus, I think that if Hulk wants to fight fair, he shouldn't even be fighting Mr. T at all, because he's a 50 year old cancer survivor, and even though he's helluva tough, he'd likely get his head punched clean off.  But that's a strip for another day.

THE ADVENTURES OF SHIT-BOY McJOHNSON

I did this back in 1994, and put it up on the web many years later. I can't find the original art, unfortunately, just this cut up version with a computer font pasted on top.

-Robert Berry
rberry@retrocrush.com